Pens and Pages

When I stepped out of my cocoon last year, I wanted to create a beautiful life... for myself and for other people like me - smart, intelligent, but unhappy, unfulfilled, unsatisfied, their potentials never tapped into, their hearts smashed every time they typed on their laptops and looked at the clock. Time passes by for them and nothing happens. Or everything happens but just by the clock. Money buys them expensive shoes but where was the time to step out? Every conversation was a game of poker where you bet or you call but you can never fold. It's been a year now. I fear I may have failed. I didn't create the world I promised myself and my invisible readers. What am I doing? My life only got worse. There were places to go to but where were the expensive shoes? Fear, trapped me in an invisible cage I carried with me everywhere I went. My neck strangled by a stranger's hands of expectations. How could I stand up to his expectations when I can't even stand up to my own? ...

Of late, I have realized I left too many doors open. I have this habit of not shutting the doors when I should, of leaving some space as tiny as a cleavage. Some doors I have shut a long time back. I didn’t simply shut them; I slammed some, the way only a teenager does when she is angry because her father snatched away her iPod. Some doors I struggled to close, one inch a day. A few of these doors are still left ajar, not awaiting someone’s arrival, but knowing there is nothing to hide behind closed doors. Closed doors – I think it’s easy to close the doors, to hide underneath the blanket of comfort, to pretend there is no world outside. Of late, I have realized easy is no fun at all. I have been trying to unlock the doors I shut eons ago. The rusted latches refuse to comply. Some doors I closed a few years ago, are giving up trying to stay shut. I look at the rooms these doors protect – mostly empty, devoid of the life they once used to hold. Was it only after the ...

I saw the shackles That made you bleed. I wiped your tears; I, too, wept. I saw the shackles That bound you so; I saw them cut into your flesh. I didn't see- They were, but, me. My tears and my hopes, Expectations and more so. When I did remove My blindfold, I set you free, I let you go.

Of outbursts and outcries of myths and lies in that gentle veil of silence the love so pure, dies The heart wails and it bleeds for all it couldn't get and all it needs And he's punished he's torn for all that is red for all he had worn  There were wounds there were scars and he was tied behind the bars Oh, there was laughter and there was cure there was lunacy and there was lure There was lust on top of hatred's pile there were the unfulfilled desires and a wicked smile Oh, there was freedom there was salvation but he knew it cannot die not his own creation On the path of oblivion lied his grave, treacherous and so he awaited, unaware of the fate precarious...